“A good father is one of the most unsung, unpraised, unnoticed and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society.”
Good fathers, the unsung heroes. We know them when we see them – some of us are lucky enough to have one. But what if you don’t? What if you got a dad who is angry, unpredictable, addicted, selfish, absent or abandoned you? When your earthly father lets you down and hurts you, it affects your view, your relationship with God.
If you’ve never experienced a kind, loving father, it’s hard to see God that way. Even when our heads tell us who He is, our hearts may feel something different.
In our relationship with God, many of us do what we did as children:
- Jump through hoops in an attempt to win Him over
- Walk on eggshells lest I evoke His wrath
- Do all the “right” things and hope I’m good enough
- Avoid Him and hope He doesn’t notice me
- Give up completely – He’ll never love me anyway.
On his blog, Man Making, Earl Hipp writes, “When fathers are absent, physically or emotionally, the wound that results is profound. It touches a man to his core and forever leaves him with the question, “Am I good enough as a person and a man?” All men long to hear the biblical pronouncement from a father – “This is my beloved son in whom I am well pleased.”
Sarah Best writes on her blog, “The first man every female bonds with is her father and that imprints on her so strongly that any later relationships with men – including romantic ones – are filtered through that experience.”
God is referred to as the Father – this muddies the waters for those struggling to recover from a dad who failed to fulfill his role – yet it can also be a source of great healing.
You didn’t get the dad, the father you needed – guess what? You have a perfect one. You are the daughter or son of the king.
You have a father in heaven who loves you so much, He came to earth as a baby to save you – to make a way for you to come home. He is faithful. He will never abandon or let you down. He longs to show you a Father’s love.
To all the imperfect, earthly dads doing their best – you don’t have to be perfect to be a good dad.
Keep loving your kids and showing up – they see it. Remember what you do is more important than what you say. We, your wives, mothers, friends and neighbors notice your love, sacrifice and hard work – it means more than you know.
How has your relationship with your dad affected your view of God?
For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. –John 3:16 NIV