doubting God

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“Where is my faith? –even deep down, right in, there is nothing but emptiness and darkness – My God – how painful is this unknown pain. It pains without ceasing – I have no faith. I dare not utter the words and thoughts that crowd in my heart and make me suffer untold agony. So many unanswered questions live within me – I am afraid to uncover them – because of the blasphemy – if there be God, please forgive…